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Reflecting on Your Beliefs for Personal Growth

In our journey towards personal growth and self-improvement, understanding our beliefs plays a crucial role. Our beliefs shape how we perceive the world, ourselves, and our potential. By identifying and reflecting on our beliefs, we can uncover deep-seated patterns that may be holding us back and cultivate a mindset that propels us forward. Here are some key questions and practical ways to reflect on your beliefs for personal growth:

Questions to Identify Core Beliefs:

  1. What beliefs do I hold about myself?
  2. How do I view my abilities and skills?
  3. What beliefs do I have about relationships?
  4. How do I perceive failure and setbacks?
  5. What are my beliefs about the world around me?
  6. How do I see my own worthiness and value?
  7. What beliefs do I hold about success and achievement?
  8. How do I interpret feedback and criticism?
  9. What are my beliefs about happiness and fulfillment?

Reflective Practices for Personal Growth:

  1. Journaling: Write down your beliefs, explore their origins, and reflect on their impact on your thoughts and actions.
  2. Mindfulness: Practice being present and observing your beliefs without judgment in different situations.
  3. Seeking Feedback: Engage in conversations with others to gain new perspectives on your beliefs.
  4. Challenge Your Beliefs: Question the validity of your beliefs and examine how they may be limiting you.
  5. Visualization: Envision a life without the constraints of limiting beliefs and explore the possibilities.
  6. Read and Learn: Educate yourself on personal development topics to gain insights into belief systems.
  7. Affirmations: Use positive affirmations to replace negative beliefs with empowering ones.
  8. Therapy or Coaching: Consider seeking professional guidance to delve deeper into your beliefs and work on transforming them.

By actively engaging in these reflective practices, you can unravel the layers of your beliefs, identify areas for growth, and pave the way for personal transformation. Embracing a mindset of curiosity, openness, and self-awareness can lead to profound shifts in your beliefs and ultimately empower you to live a more fulfilling and authentic life. Remember, personal growth is a continuous journey of self-discovery and evolution, and reflecting on your beliefs is a powerful step toward realizing your full potential.

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Navigating Relation-Based Self-Esteem (RBSE): A Journey to Inner Healing

Understanding the Impact of Contingent Self-Esteem

Relation-Based Self-Esteem (RBSE), a lesser-known aspect of self-worth, can significantly influence our emotional well-being and relationships. Unlike Competence-Based Self-Esteem (CBSE), which stems from personal achievements and abilities, RBSE hinges on external validation and emotional connections. Let’s delve into this topic, explore a relatable example, and discover resources for healing.

What Is RBSE?

RBSE develops from early experiences of emotional deprivation or rejection. Imagine growing up feeling unloved or unworthy due to strained relationships with parents or caregivers. As a result, individuals with RBSE seek affirmation and validation primarily through close relationships. Their self-worth becomes contingent upon external factors—whether they feel loved, accepted, or valued by others.

The Struggle: An Example

Meet Maya, a 30-year-old marketing professional. Maya’s RBSE journey began during her childhood. Her parents were emotionally distant, rarely expressing affection. Maya internalized this lack of warmth, believing she was unlovable. As an adult, she craved validation from her romantic partners, friends, and colleagues. Her happiness fluctuated based on their approval or disapproval.

Maya’s RBSE manifested in several ways:

  1. Fear of Rejection: Maya avoided taking risks or asserting herself. She feared rejection and often stayed in unfulfilling relationships to maintain a sense of worth.
  2. People-Pleasing: She bent over backward to please others, sacrificing her own needs. Maya’s self-worth depended on making everyone else happy.
  3. Emotional Rollercoaster: Maya’s mood swung dramatically based on external feedback. A compliment elevated her, while criticism shattered her confidence.

Healing Strategies

If you resonate with Maya’s struggle, consider these healing strategies:

  1. Self-Reflection and Awareness:
  • Acknowledge your RBSE patterns. When do you seek external validation? How does it impact your emotions and choices?
  1. Challenge Negative Beliefs:
  • Identify thoughts like “I’m only valuable if others approve” or “I’m unlovable.” Question their validity.
  1. Intrinsic Self-Worth:
  • Shift focus from external validation to internal acceptance. Explore your strengths, values, and achievements beyond relationships.
  1. Healthy Boundaries:
  • Learn to say no. Prioritize your well-being without fearing rejection.
  • Treat yourself kindly—just as you would a friend.
  1. Diversify Validation Sources:
  • Seek validation from hobbies, personal growth, and achievements.
  • Build a support network that appreciates you beyond relational roles.

Resources for Healing

  1. Books:
  • The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown: A powerful exploration of self-worth, vulnerability, and authenticity.
  • Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller: Understand attachment styles and their impact on relationships.
  1. Therapy:
  • Consider individual or group therapy. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can help restructure RBSE-related thoughts.
  1. Mindfulness Practices:
  • Meditation, yoga, and grounding techniques foster self-awareness and inner peace.
  1. Support Groups:
  • Connect with others who share similar struggles. You’re not alone.

RBSE isn’t insurmountable. By nurturing intrinsic self-worth, setting boundaries, and seeking professional guidance, you can embark on a transformative journey toward healing. Remember, you are worthy—simply because you exist.

Maya’s story is fictional, but the struggle is real. Get help today by contacting Ron Huxley.

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5 Self-Reflection Questions That Will Push Your Quality of Life

Self-reflection is only as powerful as you allow it to be – you can use it to improve yourself and use it for personal growth. But how can you leverage self-reflection to get to that point? 

The point is to examine your thoughts and actions, consider your motivations, and self-reflect to gain insights into your life. 

It comes down to asking the right questions because, with the right questions, you can unlock that potential and start fulfilling it. 

With that in mind, we have five questions you can use for self-reflection and use as guidance on your self-discovery journey. 

1. What are my core beliefs and values?

You can only make smart decisions that work for you if you firmly grip your core values and beliefs. 

So, reflecting on your principles and understanding what matters to you and what you stand for is a big part of the process. What is it that drives your decisions? Do your choices align with the values you have identified?

2. What are my weaknesses and strengths? 

One of the core components of personal growth is self-awareness, so you need to do the work to understand yourself better. Understanding your weaknesses and strengths is a big part of that. 

So, consider your areas for improvement and where you could improve. What special skills or qualities do you possess, and what are you exceptionally good at? 

To leverage your strengths for success, you need to understand what they are. Uncovering your weaknesses is also a helpful step because you can improve on them where necessary, and you can accept help from others for those points. 

3. What are my aspirations and goals?

If you want to assess your aspirations and goals, you need self-reflection. What are your short-term plans? What about your long-term ideas? Are you moving in the right direction? Have you drifted off the course you set? Do your commitments and activities align with your short and long-term goals? 

Clarifying your aspirations and goals will help you set a clear direction. It empowers you to prioritize your actions and focus your energy on making your desired outcomes come true. 

You can regularly revisit your goals as a part of a self-reflection period because everyone changes over time, and sometimes your values change. Sometimes, your priorities change, but you need to know if you want it all to work together. 

4. What have I learned from my failures and my mistakes? 

A lot of people make a mistake and think they’ve failed. Or they experience failure and think it’s the end of the world. Neither of those things is true – it’s just a temporary setback. 

You can convince yourself of that by answering how much and what you learned from those failures and mistakes in your past. Those mistakes and failures can shape your decisions and build your character. 

Learning to embrace your failure and learn lessons is crucial to personal growth. 

5. Am I fulfilling my purpose and living authentically? 

Living authentically is essential, but are you? Are you doing what it takes to fulfill your purpose? Use self-reflection to see whether your life aligns with your goal. 

Are you living based on the path you have been crafting or according to external pressure or societal expectations?

Purpose and authenticity can drive your fulfillment and success, but you must tap into that motivation and passion. 

Final Thoughts

Use these self-reflection questions as part of a regular reflection routine to motivate yourself to succeed and foster personal growth. Self-reflection isn’t a one-time task; you will need to rely on it frequently. It’s all part of the self-discovery journey.

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The Power of Yet: Embracing Growth and Positivity in the Face of Adversity

Yielding: Embracing Change and Adaptability
The first letter of YET reminds us of the importance of yielding to change. Life is constantly fluxing, and being open-minded and adaptable is crucial for personal growth. Instead of resisting change, we can embrace it as an opportunity for learning and development. By letting go of fixed perspectives and welcoming new possibilities, we create space for growth to flourish.

Encouraging: Nurturing Positivity Within and Around
The second letter of YET highlights the significance of encouragement. Positivity acts as a catalyst for growth, fueling our motivation and helping us overcome obstacles. By offering support and motivation to ourselves and others, we create an environment that fosters personal and collective development. Small acts of encouragement, such as uplifting words or acknowledging progress, can make a remarkable difference in our journey toward positivity and growth.

Trusting: Building Confidence in the Journey
The final letter of YET emphasizes the power of trust. Trusting ourselves, others, and the growth process is essential for cultivating positivity. When we trust our abilities, we build confidence and resilience, enabling us to face challenges head-on. Trusting others allows us to collaborate, seek guidance, and learn from their experiences. Moreover, having faith in the growth process helps us navigate uncertainty, knowing that every step forward contributes to our overall development.

Embracing the YET Mindset:
Embracing the YET mindset is a powerful tool for personal transformation. By yielding to change, we open ourselves up to new possibilities and embrace the growth potential. We uplift ourselves and others through encouragement, creating an atmosphere that fosters positivity and fuels our motivation. Trusting in ourselves, others and the journey ahead instills confidence and resilience, helping us navigate the ups and downs of life with grace and determination.

Practical Tips for Cultivating the YET Mindset:

  1. Practice prayer and mindfulness: Cultivate awareness of your thoughts and emotions, allowing yourself to yield to change and adapt more quickly.
  2. Celebrate progress: Encourage yourself and others by acknowledging achievements, no matter how small. Celebrating progress boosts motivation and creates positive momentum.
  3. Seek support: Trust in the power of collaboration and seek guidance and support from others who can help you grow.
  4. Embrace challenges: Instead of shying away from challenges, approach them with a mindset of curiosity and learning. Trust that you can overcome obstacles and grow from the experience.


Embracing the YET mindset—Yielding, Encouraging, Trusting—enables us to unlock our potential for growth and positivity. By yielding to change, encouraging ourselves and others, and trusting in the journey, we create an empowering environment for personal development. Let us embrace the power of YET and embark on a path of growth, resilience, and unwavering optimism. Remember, you can yield, encourage, and trust—ultimately transforming your life and positively impacting those around you.

Affirmation for the Power of YET!

  1. I am not completely forgiving YET, but I will be compassionate and embrace forgiveness, nurturing harmonious relationships.
  2. I am not an active listener YET, but I will be present and attentive, fostering deeper connections with others.
  3. I am not self-confident YET, but I will be secure in my identity, radiating inner strength and inspiring others.
  4. I am not entirely patient YET, but I will be understanding and cultivate patience, promoting peaceful interactions.
  5. I am not consistently empathetic YET, but I will be understanding and compassionate, supporting those in need.
  6. I am not entirely self-accepting YET, but I will embrace my uniqueness and love myself unconditionally.
  7. I am not entirely assertive YET, but I will express my needs and boundaries clearly and confidently.
  8. I am not always a good forgiver YET, but I will release grudges and embrace healing in my relationships.
  9. I am not fully mindful of my words YET, but I will speak with kindness and consideration, nurturing positive connections.
  10. I am not entirely free from self-doubt YET, but I will embrace my worthiness and trust in my capabilities, fostering inner growth.

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New Year Reflections (vs. Resolutions)

This year, I am working on short reflections, taking an inner path of peace and wellness instead of the traditional new year resolutions. I hope you enjoy them…

It’s Normal

It is normal to feel abnormal from time to time. Fear and uncertainty are certainties in worlds that are broken and fragmented. What is needed isn’t more glue and duct tape but more compassion and softness for ourselves. Try the softer path versus the hard, logical road and see if your journey discovers new growth in the rocks and gravel you overlooked before.

Action Step: Reflect on your inner path. How rocky has it been? Where does it feel broken? What would the softer path look like for you? What will you find that you overlooked?

Take a Breath

Inspiration doesn’t always require perspiration,
I am not against it; I have shed my share of it.
Inspiration is “in spirit,” breathing hope in and
releasing hopelessness. Pausing to feel the true
self and letting go false. Allow new ideas to
happen, without striving, with just the breath.
Take another until there are several, like
pearls on a string, shimmering in the light.

Action Step: Practice breathing more and stop trying to find inspiration and creativity. Let it find you…Don’t let the wait time increase your anxiety; start striving again. Take another breath and breath in the spirit, in-spire-nation.

OVER IT

Drinking is just the symptom of the bigger
problem, the iceberg under the surface
no one wants to consider. The yelling is just a
sign. Overeating is just the frosty
tip, the overspending, the overthinking,
the over-everything, and excesses to mask
the pain. Let’s start with a few ice cubes,
drink a glass of chilled water, and talk about
the stuff long buried. Aren’t we finally OVER IT?

Action Step: Assess how ready you are to be OVER It, whatever it is…What’s your first step for inner healing? Can you read a book, listen to a podcast, or talk to a therapist? Get out your journal, brush off the dust and start writing.

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Reflection and Journaling for the New Year

Reflections and journaling are powerful tools that can help us better understand ourselves and our lives. They can provide a sense of clarity, direction, and purpose, and can even lead to personal growth and transformation.

What is reflection?

Reflection is the process of thinking deeply about something, considering different perspectives, and learning from past experiences. It involves evaluating and analyzing events, actions, and feelings, and considering their significance and impact.

Reflection can take many forms, including self-reflection, where we reflect on our own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors; and external reflection, where we reflect on the experiences and perspectives of others. Reflection can also be formal or informal, depending on the context and the purpose of the reflection.

Why is reflection important?

Reflection is an essential part of the learning process, as it helps us make sense of our experiences and understand how they relate to our goals and values. It can also help us identify patterns and trends in our behavior and thought processes, and identify areas for improvement or growth.

Reflection can also provide a sense of perspective and clarity, and help us better understand ourselves and the world around us. It can be a way to process and make sense of difficult experiences, and can even help us find meaning and purpose in our lives.

How do we reflect?

There are many different ways to reflect, and what works best for you will depend on your personal style and preferences. Some common methods of reflection include:

• Writing in a journal: This can be a great way to capture your thoughts and feelings on paper, and can be especially helpful for processing and making sense of difficult experiences.

• Talking to someone: Sharing your thoughts and feelings with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can be a helpful way to reflect on your experiences and gain insight.

• Meditating or practicing mindfulness: These practices can help you focus your attention on the present moment and reflect on your thoughts and feelings without judgment.

• Engaging in creative activities: Creative activities like drawing, painting, or writing poetry can be a way to express and explore your thoughts and feelings in a different way.

• Doing something physical: Engaging in physical activities like exercise or yoga can be a way to reflect on your thoughts and feelings while also taking care of your physical well-being.

Why is journaling important?

Journaling is a form of reflection that involves writing down your thoughts and feelings on a regular basis. It can be a powerful tool for personal growth and development, and has a number of benefits, including:

• Providing a sense of clarity and perspective: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help you better understand and make sense of them. It can also provide a sense of perspective and help you see things in a new light.

• Enhancing self-awareness: Journaling can help you become more self-aware by providing a space to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. This can help you identify patterns and trends, and better understand your strengths and areas for growth.

• Promoting emotional well-being: Journaling can be a way to process and express difficult emotions, and can even help reduce feelings of stress and anxiety.

• Setting goals and tracking progress: Journaling can be a way to set goals and track your progress towards achieving them. It can also help you reflect on what is and isn’t working, and make any necessary adjustments.

Journaling is a simple but powerful tool that can help improve your mental well-being and overall quality of life. It involves writing down your thoughts and feelings on a regular basis, and can provide a sense of clarity, perspective, and self-awareness. It can also be a way to process and express difficult emotions, set goals, and track progress.

If you’re new to journaling, or are looking for ways to make it a more meaningful and beneficial practice, here are some tips to get started:

1. Find a comfortable and private space to journal

It’s important to have a dedicated space where you can journal without distractions or interruptions. This can be a physical space, like a quiet room or cozy corner, or it can be a virtual space, like a private journaling app or document. Make sure you have everything you need, like a pen and paper or a laptop, and create a comfortable and inviting atmosphere.

2. Choose a journaling method that works for you

There are many different ways to journal, and what works best for you will depend on your personal style and preferences. Some options include:

• Pen and paper: This is a traditional and simple way to journal, and can be especially helpful for those who enjoy the physical act of writing.

• Digital journaling: There are many apps and online platforms available that allow you to journal electronically. This can be a convenient option if you’re always on the go or prefer typing to writing.

• Creative journaling: If you’re more creative and artistic, you might enjoy using your journal as a canvas for drawing, painting, or collaging.

• Prompted journaling: If you’re struggling to know what to write about, you might find it helpful to use prompts or questions to get started. There are many online resources and journals available that provide prompts for different topics and themes.

3. Set a regular journaling schedule

To get the most out of journaling, it’s important to make it a regular practice. Choose a time of day that works best for you, and try to set aside at least 15-20 minutes for journaling. You might find it helpful to journal at the same time each day, or to schedule specific times for different types of journaling (e.g., morning pages, gratitude journaling).

4. Write freely and without judgment

One of the key benefits of journaling is that it provides a safe and private space to explore your thoughts and feelings. It’s important to remember that your journal is for you, and that you don’t have to worry about grammar, spelling, or structure. Just write freely and let your thoughts and feelings flow.

5. Be honest and authentic

Journaling is an opportunity to be honest and authentic with yourself, so don’t hold back. Write about what’s really on your mind, even if it’s difficult or uncomfortable. You might be surprised at the insights and revelations that come from this process.

6. Reflect on and learn from your journaling

Journaling is a form of reflection, so it’s important to take some time to review and analyze your writing. Look for patterns and trends in your thoughts and feelings, and consider how they relate to your goals and values. Use your journaling as a way to learn about yourself and identify areas for growth and improvement.

7. Consider sharing your journal with someone you trust

Sharing your journal with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can be a powerful way to gain additional insights and support. It’s important to choose someone who is supportive and non-judgmental, and to only share what you feel comfortable sharing.

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20 Ways to Forgive – Infographic

How to invite forgiveness to bless your life…

Forgiveness is both a decision and a process. Choose one of the ways listed in this infographic to implement in your life for one week. Assess how it has blessed you and then try a new way until you feel the weight of hurt and bitterness lessen.

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5 Ways to Boost Your Mental Health

Scientists tell us there are certain things we can do to improve our mental wellbeing. These techniques will help you feel more positive about yourself.

They teach you how to ride the lows and wait out the lows. Once you know that, nothing can stop you from getting what you want out of life.

Today, we’re going to share with you five ways to boost your mental health. Keep reading for more.

1. Connect With Others

Good relationships don’t need years to build. They can form in a matter of months, or weeks even. Plus, they don’t have to be an all-in, best-friends-for-life type of relationship.

Just talking to a neighbor or members of your church can have a great impact on your mental health. You learn to listen, empathize, and build a strong sense of self-worth and value.

Have you and a friend not seen each other in a while? Then, reach out and try to arrange a coffee date so you can get together and catch up.

How about your children or other family members? Why not try to set an hour during the day where you talk or play games?

We all know how social media has become an important part of our lives. And it’s made it easier to stay in touch with important people in our lives, especially if they live far away.

It’s good to text and chat on a regular basis. Just make sure technology isn’t replacing your face-to-face communications with people.

2. Learn New Skills

Learning a new skill or hobby can have a significant boost on your mental health. It’s an excellent way to meet new people and improve your self-esteem.

It’s nice to have a sense of purpose, other than your work. It gives you something to look forward to each day.

The problem, however, is many people complain they don’t have enough hours in the day. Luckily, though, technology has made learning more accessible.

Here are some of the ways you can use those high-tech gadgets you have to good use:

• Sign up for an online course, like learning a new language or a practical skill like programming

• Look for free video tutorials online to help you out with a DIY project

• If you enjoy cooking, find healthy recipes and learn how to make them

• Try a new hobby that challenges and entertains you, like painting, writing, or gardening

• Learn to play a new sport or physical activity

3. Pay More Attention

We’re all guilty of not paying attention to people and things going on around us. We’re always busy with work or scrolling through our social media feed.

Learning to focus all your senses on the present moment can improve your mental well-being. It also boosts your mood and lowers stress levels. Experts call this type of focus ‘mindfulness’.

When you practice mindfulness, you enjoy the little things in life. Things like watching a bird soar overhead or taking in the nuances of nature are just two small examples.

When you’re in tune with the small details, you feel more relaxed and at peace. Plus, you start to get a better understanding of what makes you happy or anxious, which is a healthy way to approach life’s challenges.

4. Get Physically Active

When you do any type of physical activity, you boost your physical fitness, as well as your mental wellness. It could be a short 15-minute walk, an hour of cycling each week, or 30 minutes at the gym. You pick the activities that you enjoy and that make you feel good.

Then, once you start noticing the difference, you start to feel good about your looks. That’s when your confidence will soar through the roof.

In addition, your brain signals the nervous central system to release ‘feel-good’ hormones known as endorphins. These wonder chemicals trigger a positive response, which boosts your mood. They also reduce feelings of pain and anxiety.

Check out the following tips on how to get moving to boost your mental health:

• Look online for free activities catered to your fitness level

• Find local centers where you can dance, swim, or cycle

• Try running with a ‘couch to 5K’ app or podcast

• If you have a chronic health condition or a disability, there are many exercise’s and physical activities that can be customized to meet your needs

5. Give to Others

According to research, acts of kindness and giving are great ways to improve your mental well-being. The reason is that when we help others, our brains trigger the release of another ‘feel-good’ hormone called oxytocin.

This chemical promotes feelings of empathy and trust. It also makes us calmer, happier, and more inspired to do more.

Giving to others could be volunteering at a local shelter or helping out someone on a personal level. The point is to offer your time and energy doing something for other people. In return, you’ll feel good about yourself, knowing that you’re valued and appreciated

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Prayer and Meditation Calms Anxiety

If you feel anxious from time to time, that’s completely normal. When anxiety becomes overwhelming, you may be tempted to seek some peace using prescription medication, alcohol, or drugs. These methods, though, inherently bring problems of their own.

The good news is you can get through anxious moments on your own without mind-altering drugs. Your worries can be transformed into peace with simple, natural strategies. One of these techniques is using prayer and meditation.

Prayer and meditation calm anxiety!

What are Prayer and Meditation?

Prayer is “a spiritual communion with God or an object of worship, as in supplication, thanksgiving, adoration, or confession.” It is the heart of practices in all major religions. When we struggle, we call out to God for strength, direction, peace, and healing. 

Mediation is a form of prayer. It is a practice of training the mind by focusing on an object, thought, or activity, enabling the busy mind to be still and the stressed body to find rest. 

Inherent in both prayer and mediation is the act of letting go of control or accepting that control is an illusion. The practitioners of Alcoholics Anonymous called this “acceptance” that they are powerless over their addiction and in need of a higher power. 

Prayer and meditation differ because prayer is a form of communication, asking for help. Meditation concentrates on quietness and focus, without any criticism or judgment of others or self. 

Calming Anxiety

Research supports the idea that prayer and reduces the effects of anxiety and depression. In a 2009 report, researchers reviewed 26 studies that identified the active involvement of medical patients in private or personal prayer. The focus was not on the effect of being prayed for or on the usefulness of attending religious meetings. 

The authors of the research review stated: “There is no evidence that praying is likely to be beneficial in the absence of any kind of faith and some evidence that certain types of prayer based on desperate pleas for help in the absence of faith are associated with poorer wellbeing and function.” 

While both prayer and meditation can calm anxiety, it appears that prayer is more beneficial when connected to faith. 

Meditation has been widely researched and it has been demonstrated to reduce anxiety, chronic pain, heart disease, and high blood pressure. It is considered to be a mind-body intervention that “eliminates the stream of jumbled thoughts that may be crowding your mind and causing stress.”

In addition, the emotional benefits of meditation can include:

  • Gaining a new perspective on stressful situations
  • Building skills to manage your stress
  • Increasing self-awareness
  • Focusing on the present
  • Reducing negative emotions
  • Increasing imagination and creativity
  • Increasing patience and tolerance

There are various forms of meditation that involve guided meditation, mindfulness-based stress meditation, walking meditation, visualizations, and more. Technology is a big aid with various apps and online programs that can assist in meditative practices.

How to Get Started

You can start on your path to an anxiety-free life right away, and it all begins with a deep breath. Pull the air deep down into your diaphragm, and let it out slowly. Do this several times, and you’ll start to feel calmer.

Are you breathing effectively? When you take in air, if only the top part of your lungs expands, your chest rises and falls. When you live the right way – the calming way – your belly rises and falls, not your upper chest, because your entire lungs are filled with fresh air. 

Avoid breathing from your upper chest only, and you’ll already be on the road to feeling calmer and less anxious. It’s a simple thing to do and a great way to get started. The more you do it, the more it’ll become automatic. Soon, you’ll feel calmer without even thinking about your breathing anymore. 

Here are some other tips to help you feel calm while praying or meditating:

1. Use your breathing like a mantra. Inhale while you give yourself positive thoughts and feelings. Exhale anything negative you’re thinking or feeling. Breathing is the rhythm of life. Use it to your advantage. Use affirmative words or phrases, quoting scriptures or songs. 

2. Pray or meditate at the same time each day. Spend a few minutes – it doesn’t have to be a long time – in quiet reflection. Say good things to yourself. You can focus on your health, finances, family, or anything you want to make stronger. Avoid negative thinking during this time. 

3. Laugh. Try saying “ho, ho, ho, he, he, he, ha, ha, ha” and other silly phrases. When you do, you’ll start to smile, then grin, and then laugh for real! And when you’re laughing, you can’t frown or feel anxious! Laughter reduces the stress chemicals in your brain and increases the amount of oxygen flowing through your brain and body. 

4. Find community. Join a church, take up yoga, or find a support group for anxiety. Many others share your struggle, and you can feel better about yourself and more in-tune with others when you share your feelings. 

5. Savor positive experiences. You wouldn’t gobble up an expensive piece of chocolate you bought. You would savor it slowly, trying to get as much flavor and joy from it as possible before it is gone. When we do this with our positive experiences, no matter how small, our nervous system registers it and remembers it allowing greater capacity for calmness. 

Next Steps

When you start your journey toward personal peace through prayer or meditation, don’t expect to conquer your anxiety in a day. It took time to get where you are, and it’ll take time to get back to where you want to be.

Every journey begins with that first step, and once you make it, you’ll be well on your way. Breathe. Laugh. Meditate or pray. Find time to think about and interact with others rather than concentrate on your worries. Rewire your nervous system through consistent practices of wellbeing. 

Sources: 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/meditation/in-depth/meditation/art-20045858

https://www.nursingtimes.net/archive/prayer-can-reduce-levels-of-depression-and-anxiety-in-patients-according-to-research-12-02-2009/