Emotional Regulation Tools for Stressed-Out People

Emotional regulation is the ability to manage and respond to our emotions in a healthy and productive way. It’s a crucial skill to have, especially for those who struggle with stress and anxiety. When we’re overwhelmed by negative emotions, it can be difficult to think clearly and make good decisions. However, with some practice and effort, we can learn to regulate our emotions and feel more in control of our lives.

Here are some strategies for improving emotional regulation in times of stress and anxiety:

1. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your attention to the present moment, without judgment. It can help you become more aware of your thoughts and emotions, and allow you to respond to them in a more thoughtful way. Try setting aside a few minutes each day to sit quietly and focus on your breath, or try a guided mindfulness meditation.

2. Use deep breathing: Deep breathing is a simple but effective way to calm the body and mind. When we’re stressed or anxious, our breath tends to become shallow and rapid. By slowing down and deepening our breath, we can help activate the body’s natural relaxation response. Try taking a few slow, deep breaths whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed.

3. Engage in physical activity: Exercise can be a great way to reduce stress and improve emotional regulation. It releases endorphins, which are chemicals that improve mood and reduce feelings of stress. Plus, getting your body moving can be a great distraction from negative thoughts and emotions.

4. Practice gratitude: Focusing on the things we’re grateful for can help shift our perspective and improve our mood. Try keeping a gratitude journal where you write down three things you’re grateful for each day. Or, share your gratitude with a friend or family member.

5. Seek support: It’s important to remember that you don’t have to face stress and anxiety alone. Talk to a trusted friend or family member about how you’re feeling, or consider seeking support from a mental health professional.

6. Use positive self-talk: Our thoughts have a powerful impact on our emotions. When we’re struggling with stress and anxiety, it’s common to have negative thoughts about ourselves or the situation. By practicing positive self-talk, we can reframe these negative thoughts and improve our emotional well-being. For example, instead of telling yourself “I can’t handle this,” try saying “I’m doing the best I can and I will get through this.”

7. Take breaks: It’s important to give yourself time to relax and recharge. Make sure to schedule breaks into your day and take time to do things you enjoy. This could be something as simple as going for a walk or reading a book.

8. Use relaxation techniques: There are a variety of relaxation techniques that can be helpful for managing stress and anxiety. These might include progressive muscle relaxation, visualization, or guided imagery. Experiment with different techniques to see what works best for you.

9. Set boundaries: It’s important to set boundaries and make sure you’re not taking on more than you can handle. Learn to say no to things that don’t align with your values or that are overwhelming for you.

10. Seek professional help: If you’re struggling to manage your stress and anxiety on your own, it may be helpful to seek the support of a mental health professional. They can provide you with tools and strategies to help you cope with difficult emotions and improve your overall well-being.

Emotional regulation is a skill that can be developed with practice. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth the effort. By using the strategies outlined above, you can learn to manage your emotions in a healthy and productive way, even in times of stress and anxiety.

6 Steps Adoptive Parents Need to Learn

When you adopt a child, it’s not uncommon to find yourself parenting a child who has been traumatized. The emotional regulation skills that all children learn in their early years were probably not developed as well as they could have been in the child’s pre-adoption life, and now you’re facing the task of helping your child learn how to manage their emotions.

It’s not always easy, but some strategies can help make this process easier. Here are some tips for dealing with emotionally dysregulated children who were adopted:

1.) Learn about trauma and its effects on developing minds and bodies.

2.) Learn about emotional regulation and how it develops in children.

3.) Identify what emotional regulation looks like for your child—what do they do when they get upset? How do they express anger? Frustration? Sadness? Joy? What helps them calm down when they get upset? What makes them get upset or escalate into inappropriate behaviors? And most importantly: what doesn’t work when they feel overwhelmed by intense emotions?

4.) Since every child is unique, there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Learn brain-based parenting skills and methods.

5) Identity the attachment styles for each family member and discover techniques that create greater security.

6) Take care of yourself. Self-care is not a luxury. It is necessary to be more patient and resilient with your dysregulated child.

Take a free course on Trauma-Informed Care in the home, school, and community at TraumaToolbox.com.

If you need specialized help, contact Ron Huxley today by clicking here and scheduling an appointment.

Top 7 Ways to Respond When Your Child Shares Feelings | Kinship Center

“Top 7 Ways to Respond When Your Child Shares Feelings”

One of the most important skills for a child’s emotional healing is the ability to identify and express emotion.  When a child can communicate their internal experience, he or she creates the foundation to alleviate past loss, abandonment, or trauma.  When the child connects to caregivers through sensitive sharing, the parent simultaneously becomes better equipped to understand the child’s joy, sorrow, fear, and frustration.

Some children easily share thoughts and feelings while others quietly leave the room or become “invisible” when anyone asks about feelings.  Whatever example describes your child, your response can either keep the conversation going or shut it down.   

There are times when every parent thinks, “What do I say back to my child?” or “How do I encourage my child to talk to me?” Use the following strategies to guide you: 

  1. Praise your child’s feeling comments- When your child tells you his or her emotions, express your appreciation to reinforce their behavior.  Say, “Thanks for sharing,” “I’m glad you told me,” or “I like it when you tell me how you feel.”  
  2. Mirror your child’s remarks– As you listen, summarize your child’s statement to ensure you heard the words correctly and to show the importance of his or her comments. Be careful not to simply repeat your child’s exact words as most kids consider this practice to be irritating!
  3. Help your child feel heard and understood– When a child feels heard and understood they are more likely to share and to feel connected to their caregivers. Convey that you are listening and understand your child’s point of view through sentence starters: “It makes sense to me …,” “I understand …,” and “It sounds like you’re saying …”
  4. “Is there more?” When you are listening to your child’s communicate about the situation and how they feel use this question, “Is there more you want to tell me?” You have heard everything they need to say when their answer is, “No.” 
  5. Check on your child’s needs or wants- After your child has explained his or her feelings, they may need further help or reassurance from you.  At this time ask, “Is there anything you need or want from me?”  “What can I do to make this situation better for you?” Your child may need you to intervene on their behalf, give them a hug, or spend time alone with you. 
  6.  Differentiate between thoughts and feelings– Help your child to visually delineate between thoughts and feelings through their location in the body.  Explain feelings reside in their heart while thoughts are located in their head. For example, “Can you tell me about the feelings in your heart?” or “What are the thoughts in your head?” 
  7. Do not jump in to fix the problem- Understandably, most parents can not stand to see their child in pain, and we want to fix it as soon as possible. But, by overlooking your child’s emotions leaves your child feeling alone and misunderstood. Before you work on fixing the difficulty, listen carefully with open ears!

One of our Kinship Center social workers recommended this interesting blog post by Kentucky therapist Carol Lozier…to follow her blog,  click here.

     

    Ron Raves: A great company and great advice…yes, I am biased because I work here 🙂