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STOP Anxiety and Unwanted Emotions in Four Simple Steps

Dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) is a therapeutic approach that has been used to treat a variety of mental health issues, including anxiety. It focuses on helping individuals learn how to regulate their emotions and build healthier relationships. One of the core concepts of DBT is the “stop technique”, which is a tool that can be used to help reduce anxiety.

What is the DBT stop technique?

The DBT stop technique is a way to help individuals recognize and manage their emotions in a healthy way. It is based on the idea that when we experience strong emotions, it can be difficult to think clearly and make rational decisions. The stop technique encourages individuals to pause and take a moment to recognize their feelings and to make a conscious effort to shift their focus to something else.

The stop technique is broken down into four steps:

  1. Stop: This is the first step in the technique and it involves taking a moment to recognize your emotions and to pause. You can do this by saying the word “stop” to yourself or by taking a few deep breaths.
  2. Take a step back: The second step is to take a step back and to observe the situation from a distance. This can help to provide perspective and to give you a better understanding of the situation.
  3. Observe: The third step is to observe your thoughts and feelings without judgement. This can help to provide clarity and to give you a better understanding of yourself and the situation.
  4. Proceed: The fourth step is to proceed with a plan of action. This could involve talking to someone about your feelings, writing down your thoughts, or engaging in a calming activity.

How can the DBT stop technique help with anxiety?

The DBT stop technique can be a helpful tool for individuals who are struggling with anxiety. It can help to provide a sense of control and to give individuals a sense of clarity. It can also help to reduce feelings of overwhelm by allowing individuals to take a step back and to observe their emotions without judgement.

The stop technique can also help to reduce the intensity of anxiety-related symptoms, such as racing thoughts, increased heart rate, and difficulty concentrating. By recognizing and acknowledging your feelings, you can take control of the situation and focus on calming yourself down.

Using the DBT stop technique effectively

Using the DBT stop technique effectively requires practice and dedication. It can be helpful to talk to a therapist about your experience with the technique and to practice it in a safe, comfortable environment. It is also important to be patient with yourself and to remember that it takes time to develop new skills.

It is also important to remember that the stop technique is not a “cure-all” for anxiety. It is a tool that can be used to help manage anxiety in the moment, but it is not a replacement for other forms of therapy or treatment.

Ron Huxley can help you stop anxiety and any other unwanted emotions. Let’s schedule an appointment for you today!

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Reflection and Journaling for the New Year

Reflections and journaling are powerful tools that can help us better understand ourselves and our lives. They can provide a sense of clarity, direction, and purpose, and can even lead to personal growth and transformation.

What is reflection?

Reflection is the process of thinking deeply about something, considering different perspectives, and learning from past experiences. It involves evaluating and analyzing events, actions, and feelings, and considering their significance and impact.

Reflection can take many forms, including self-reflection, where we reflect on our own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors; and external reflection, where we reflect on the experiences and perspectives of others. Reflection can also be formal or informal, depending on the context and the purpose of the reflection.

Why is reflection important?

Reflection is an essential part of the learning process, as it helps us make sense of our experiences and understand how they relate to our goals and values. It can also help us identify patterns and trends in our behavior and thought processes, and identify areas for improvement or growth.

Reflection can also provide a sense of perspective and clarity, and help us better understand ourselves and the world around us. It can be a way to process and make sense of difficult experiences, and can even help us find meaning and purpose in our lives.

How do we reflect?

There are many different ways to reflect, and what works best for you will depend on your personal style and preferences. Some common methods of reflection include:

• Writing in a journal: This can be a great way to capture your thoughts and feelings on paper, and can be especially helpful for processing and making sense of difficult experiences.

• Talking to someone: Sharing your thoughts and feelings with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can be a helpful way to reflect on your experiences and gain insight.

• Meditating or practicing mindfulness: These practices can help you focus your attention on the present moment and reflect on your thoughts and feelings without judgment.

• Engaging in creative activities: Creative activities like drawing, painting, or writing poetry can be a way to express and explore your thoughts and feelings in a different way.

• Doing something physical: Engaging in physical activities like exercise or yoga can be a way to reflect on your thoughts and feelings while also taking care of your physical well-being.

Why is journaling important?

Journaling is a form of reflection that involves writing down your thoughts and feelings on a regular basis. It can be a powerful tool for personal growth and development, and has a number of benefits, including:

• Providing a sense of clarity and perspective: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help you better understand and make sense of them. It can also provide a sense of perspective and help you see things in a new light.

• Enhancing self-awareness: Journaling can help you become more self-aware by providing a space to reflect on your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. This can help you identify patterns and trends, and better understand your strengths and areas for growth.

• Promoting emotional well-being: Journaling can be a way to process and express difficult emotions, and can even help reduce feelings of stress and anxiety.

• Setting goals and tracking progress: Journaling can be a way to set goals and track your progress towards achieving them. It can also help you reflect on what is and isn’t working, and make any necessary adjustments.

Journaling is a simple but powerful tool that can help improve your mental well-being and overall quality of life. It involves writing down your thoughts and feelings on a regular basis, and can provide a sense of clarity, perspective, and self-awareness. It can also be a way to process and express difficult emotions, set goals, and track progress.

If you’re new to journaling, or are looking for ways to make it a more meaningful and beneficial practice, here are some tips to get started:

1. Find a comfortable and private space to journal

It’s important to have a dedicated space where you can journal without distractions or interruptions. This can be a physical space, like a quiet room or cozy corner, or it can be a virtual space, like a private journaling app or document. Make sure you have everything you need, like a pen and paper or a laptop, and create a comfortable and inviting atmosphere.

2. Choose a journaling method that works for you

There are many different ways to journal, and what works best for you will depend on your personal style and preferences. Some options include:

• Pen and paper: This is a traditional and simple way to journal, and can be especially helpful for those who enjoy the physical act of writing.

• Digital journaling: There are many apps and online platforms available that allow you to journal electronically. This can be a convenient option if you’re always on the go or prefer typing to writing.

• Creative journaling: If you’re more creative and artistic, you might enjoy using your journal as a canvas for drawing, painting, or collaging.

• Prompted journaling: If you’re struggling to know what to write about, you might find it helpful to use prompts or questions to get started. There are many online resources and journals available that provide prompts for different topics and themes.

3. Set a regular journaling schedule

To get the most out of journaling, it’s important to make it a regular practice. Choose a time of day that works best for you, and try to set aside at least 15-20 minutes for journaling. You might find it helpful to journal at the same time each day, or to schedule specific times for different types of journaling (e.g., morning pages, gratitude journaling).

4. Write freely and without judgment

One of the key benefits of journaling is that it provides a safe and private space to explore your thoughts and feelings. It’s important to remember that your journal is for you, and that you don’t have to worry about grammar, spelling, or structure. Just write freely and let your thoughts and feelings flow.

5. Be honest and authentic

Journaling is an opportunity to be honest and authentic with yourself, so don’t hold back. Write about what’s really on your mind, even if it’s difficult or uncomfortable. You might be surprised at the insights and revelations that come from this process.

6. Reflect on and learn from your journaling

Journaling is a form of reflection, so it’s important to take some time to review and analyze your writing. Look for patterns and trends in your thoughts and feelings, and consider how they relate to your goals and values. Use your journaling as a way to learn about yourself and identify areas for growth and improvement.

7. Consider sharing your journal with someone you trust

Sharing your journal with a trusted friend, family member, or therapist can be a powerful way to gain additional insights and support. It’s important to choose someone who is supportive and non-judgmental, and to only share what you feel comfortable sharing.

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Emotional Regulation Tools for Stressed-Out People

Emotional regulation is the ability to manage and respond to our emotions in a healthy and productive way. It’s a crucial skill to have, especially for those who struggle with stress and anxiety. When we’re overwhelmed by negative emotions, it can be difficult to think clearly and make good decisions. However, with some practice and effort, we can learn to regulate our emotions and feel more in control of our lives.

Here are some strategies for improving emotional regulation in times of stress and anxiety:

1. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your attention to the present moment, without judgment. It can help you become more aware of your thoughts and emotions, and allow you to respond to them in a more thoughtful way. Try setting aside a few minutes each day to sit quietly and focus on your breath, or try a guided mindfulness meditation.

2. Use deep breathing: Deep breathing is a simple but effective way to calm the body and mind. When we’re stressed or anxious, our breath tends to become shallow and rapid. By slowing down and deepening our breath, we can help activate the body’s natural relaxation response. Try taking a few slow, deep breaths whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed.

3. Engage in physical activity: Exercise can be a great way to reduce stress and improve emotional regulation. It releases endorphins, which are chemicals that improve mood and reduce feelings of stress. Plus, getting your body moving can be a great distraction from negative thoughts and emotions.

4. Practice gratitude: Focusing on the things we’re grateful for can help shift our perspective and improve our mood. Try keeping a gratitude journal where you write down three things you’re grateful for each day. Or, share your gratitude with a friend or family member.

5. Seek support: It’s important to remember that you don’t have to face stress and anxiety alone. Talk to a trusted friend or family member about how you’re feeling, or consider seeking support from a mental health professional.

6. Use positive self-talk: Our thoughts have a powerful impact on our emotions. When we’re struggling with stress and anxiety, it’s common to have negative thoughts about ourselves or the situation. By practicing positive self-talk, we can reframe these negative thoughts and improve our emotional well-being. For example, instead of telling yourself “I can’t handle this,” try saying “I’m doing the best I can and I will get through this.”

7. Take breaks: It’s important to give yourself time to relax and recharge. Make sure to schedule breaks into your day and take time to do things you enjoy. This could be something as simple as going for a walk or reading a book.

8. Use relaxation techniques: There are a variety of relaxation techniques that can be helpful for managing stress and anxiety. These might include progressive muscle relaxation, visualization, or guided imagery. Experiment with different techniques to see what works best for you.

9. Set boundaries: It’s important to set boundaries and make sure you’re not taking on more than you can handle. Learn to say no to things that don’t align with your values or that are overwhelming for you.

10. Seek professional help: If you’re struggling to manage your stress and anxiety on your own, it may be helpful to seek the support of a mental health professional. They can provide you with tools and strategies to help you cope with difficult emotions and improve your overall well-being.

Emotional regulation is a skill that can be developed with practice. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth the effort. By using the strategies outlined above, you can learn to manage your emotions in a healthy and productive way, even in times of stress and anxiety.

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Helpful Healing Strategies from Trauma, Difficult Situations & Hard Moments of Grief or Loss (a Holy Mess Podcast)

I am so excited to guess again on the Holy Mess Podcast (see the link below). The show creator, Dani Sumner, has the #1 Christian Mental Health podcast on Spotify. This episode talks about healing from a body, mind, and spirit perspective. At the end of the podcast, I will lead you through a short meditation on how to “resource” safety from each perspective. You don’t want to mess with this podcast: Click here now!

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10 Ways to Manage Your Panic Attacks

“In my experience, the words “now just calm down” almost inevitably have the opposite effect on the person you are speaking to.” – Elyn Saks

A panic attack is a sudden and intense feeling of fear or anxiety that can be overwhelming and debilitating. It is often accompanied by physical symptoms such as rapid heartbeat, difficulty breathing, dizziness, sweating, trembling, and a feeling of impending doom. Some people may also experience chest pain, nausea, and a fear of losing control or going crazy.

During a panic attack, the body’s fight or flight response is activated, even though there is no real danger. This response causes the physical symptoms of a panic attack and a heightened state of alertness and arousal.

Many things trigger panic attacks, social events, public speaking, conflict with family or coworkers, and situations reminiscent of past traumas. Sometimes, an accumulation of stress builds up over time and then pops up unexpectedly in a panic. 

Most people believe they have a heart attack when experiencing a panic attack. They often go to the emergency room or their doctor for a checkup. When the doctor cannot find anything physically wrong with them, they suggest that the individual might have had a panic attack and recommend talking to a mental health professional. 

Family and friends feel helpless around individuals who struggle with panic attacks. They can suggest useless advice or tell them to “calm down,” which never works. 

Mental health professionals might offer several strategies to cope with a panic attack:

  1. Focus on your breathing: Take slow, deep breaths through your nose and out through your mouth. This can help to calm your body and mind.
  2. Use positive self-talk: Remind yourself that you are safe and that the panic attack will pass.
  3. Find a peaceful place to relax: Find a quiet place where you can sit or lie down and relax.
  4. Use relaxation techniques: Try progressive muscle relaxation, visualization, or mindfulness meditation to help you relax.
  5. Find a focus object: Redirect your attention to something in clear sight and consciously notice all the details about that object, engaging all of your senses if possible.
  6. Picture a safe place, face, or space: Visualizing a place or location that holds a positive memory can be helpful to calm the nervous system. Additionally, you can picture someone safe or an activity that gives you joy. 
  7. Engage in light exercise: Taking a walk, stretching, or playing an outdoor game with someone can alleviate the stressful energy in your body.
  8. Use a mantra or affirmation: A positive statement, verse, song, or quote can redirect fear or worry about your condition and reset negative thoughts. 
  9. Change your life situation: If panic results from stress, consider distancing yourself from people, changing jobs, setting boundaries, or reorganizing living situations for your future health.
  10. Reach out to someone: Talk to a friend or loved one, or consider seeking support from a mental health professional.

The best time to deal with a panic attack is before you have a panic attack. Trying to deal with one in the middle is highly challenging to control. A daily practice of calming, affirming prayer and meditation, healthier living, and new perspectives can strengthen the body’s defenses, so the panic never comes up again. 

Panic attacks can be very distressing and may interfere with daily activities. It is essential to seek help from a mental health professional if you are experiencing panic attacks, as they can be treated effectively with therapy and medication. Consult Ron Huxley today if you are struggling with panic attacks and want help. 

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Winter Blues, Go Away!

The winter blues are a real thing. Seasonal depression, also known as seasonal affective disorder (SAD), is a type of depression that occurs at the same time every year. It usually starts in the fall and continues into the winter months. In a given year, about 5 percent of the U.S. population will report symptoms of seasonal depression. Seasonal depression is more common in women than men. The main onset of seasonal depression is between 20 and 30 years of age but it can happen earlier. It is also more common in people who live in northern climates.

Typical symptoms of seasonal depression include loss of self-esteem, hopelessness, diminished interest in activities, low tolerance for stress, extreme mood swings, sleep problems, lethargy, overeating, avoidance of social contact, and loss of libido.

There are several theories about what causes seasonal depression. One theory is that it is caused by a lack of sunlight. Sunlight helps our bodies produce vitamin D, which is essential for our mood. Another theory is that changing seasons can disrupt our body’s natural circadian rhythms. It’s certainly no surprise that this time of year brings a lot of stressors into our lives, and people can feel lonely and isolated on top of it all.

Even if we don’t know why the winter blues come this time of year, the good news is that you can do things to ease your symptoms and beat seasonal depression.

Here are a few tips:

  • Get outside: Spend time in the sunlight, even if it’s just for a few minutes. This can help improve your mood and boost your energy levels. One option is light therapy, which involves sitting in front of a special light box for 30 minutes daily.
  • Exercise: Exercise releases endorphins, which have mood-boosting effects. A moderate amount of activity is the key to maintaining your mental health.
  • Connect with others: Isolation can worsen seasonal affective disorder symptoms. It can be a vicious cycle where we feel cut off but don’t want to reach out, and the process spins on. Make an effort to talk to friends or professionals.
  • Practice gratitude: Studies have shown that gratitude can have a powerful effect on your well-being. It can improve your physical health, mental health, and overall satisfaction with life. Reflect on the things you’re grateful for, no matter how small.
  • Another option is an antidepressant medication. If you think you might be suffering from seasonal depression, talk to your doctor. I know lots of people don’t want to take medication, and there is certainly no “happy pill” but medication may alleviate a lot of your symptoms.

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Breaking out of Negative Thoughts and Rumination

Do you ever feel like your mind is racing or your thoughts are stuck in a loop? You might be experiencing what’s called negative thinking or rumination. People who engage in this tend to overthink things, strive for perfection, look at the downside of events and miss the good stuff that happened to them.

Coping with negative thoughts and rumination can be a challenge. But it’s not impossible to overcome, and it’s not something you have to live with forever.

The good news is that you can learn ways to cope with negative thinking and rumination without using medications. Here are some things that might help:

1) Practice mindfulness meditation. This involves focusing on the present moment without judgment, especially when you have negative or repetitive thoughts. You can try this by focusing on your breath, listening to music or nature sounds (like rain or waves), or simply sitting quietly in silence and noticing what’s happening around you (or inside yourself).

2) If you are spiritual, pray! Prayer is a powerful weapon against depression and anxiety. It can be hard to pray when you are overwhelmed by negative thoughts, but if you commit yourself to prayer as a daily routine, it will help keep your mind focused on what matters most.

3) Get some exercise. Exercise releases endorphins into the brain, making us feel better about ourselves and more optimistic about our lives. So if you’ve been feeling down lately, try getting out for a run instead of staying cooped up inside all day!

4) Eat healthy foods! Eating well helps regulate hormones in our bodies that are responsible for mood swings (like serotonin). So if you’re feeling down, try eating something like strawberries or almonds—they contain nutrients that promote happiness and contentment. Ever heard the expression: “Your mental health is at the end of your fork”? It’s true.

5) Try writing down your feelings instead of keeping them bottled up inside where no one else can see them except for yourself (and even then, only if you want to share them with others. Grammer and punctuation aren’t necessary. The point is to let that negative go.

6) Identify the areas where you were hurt or traumatized. Destructive thought patterns can result from betrayal, abandonment, unfair actions, and traumatic events. We can internalize external actions and believe we are the problem or too broken, leaving us in a vicious loop of negative thoughts and feelings.

7) Work with a professional therapist specializing in trauma-informed practices and Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Together, you can get to the unhealthy core beliefs causing so much pain and suffering and find alternative perspectives on your life.

Negative thinking and rumination are exhausting. It ruins your sleep, and it interferes with your day. If you want help finding a way out of this destructive pattern, contact Ron Huxley and set up an appointment to start feeling good immediately! Click here now…

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Have a Power-FULL Morning!

Did you wake up in a mood today? We often wake up thinking about the problems we have to face today. We rehearse the past memories and circumstances that create a hyper state of arousal, using the natural cortisol levels of the morning to increase anxiety, fear, irritability, and anger.

Before your feet hit the floor, use gratitudes to change how you think and feel. Use the natural energy of cortisol to direct your thoughts and behaviors in the morning. Engage in meditation and focus for the day and be more productive and creative with using that cortisol. Make today better than yesterday. Make your inspiration greater than your suffering!

Use your cortisol to have a power-full morning!

Let Ron Huxley help you find more power in your life by scheduling a session today or using the power-full tools at FamilyHealer.tv

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6 Tips To Make Fear Your Friend

What makes you afraid? Is it losing someone you love? Or is it having to see your dentist? Maybe you fear thunderstorms or heights or elevators.

Whatever it is, fear is normal. It’s how our body warns us of dangerous situations and that we should be careful.

Yet, sometimes, our fears can become so great that they hold us back from living up to our full potential. They fill us with dread and uncertainty that we soon become constantly stressed and anxious over the smallest things.

Although surprisingly, fear, in its positive form, can actually be good for us. It can inspire innovative ideas and motivate us to reach new heights.

So, we’re here today to help you make fear your friend. Follow the six tips below, and you’ll know how to turn what was once your foe into an ally.

Let’s get started.

  1. Identify the Source

This is probably the hardest step, but it’s absolutely worth it. But first, you need to come to terms with the source of your fear in order to overcome it.

Being aware of the root cause will be difficult in the beginning, but it’ll make you stronger. You’ll no longer live in the shadow of that big, insurmountable fear.

  1. Embrace It

You’ve come face-to-face with your fear. Now, it’s time to embrace it.

But before you do that, you have to actually admit that such-and-such scares you. There are several ways to do this. First, you can either say it aloud, preferably to someone else in a natural setting.

You can also write it down in a journal or diary. The point is to get it out of your head and into real life. That’s when your fear loses its control over you.

It also feels better to get it off your chest and share it with the world. You’ll be surprised to know just how many people are just as afraid as you are.

  1. Think Rationally

Fear makes us panic, and panic makes us do stupid things. In fact, studies show that when we panic, our prefrontal cortex shuts down. This is the region of our brain responsible for rational thinking.

So, case in point, learn how to think rationally despite your worries and panic. Make fear your friend, and you’ll be able to go a lot farther in life.

  1. Take Stock

People deal with fear, stress, and anxiety in different ways. Some people like to be challenged and are great under pressure. Others find it better to work at their own pace without any tight deadlines looming overhead.

Whichever way you prefer, the important thing is not to let fear get the better of you. For example, say you’re afraid to speak in public. But then a colleague suddenly got sick and asked you to take over the presentation you’ve been preparing for weeks.

In this scenario, you have to pick whether you’ll let your fear overpower you or whether you’ll rise to the challenge.

The latter won’t be easy, but it’ll definitely be worth it in the long run. Be objective and tell yourself that others have held presentations before and have lived to tell about it. So, what’s the big deal?

Remember, your mind tends to blow things out of proportion. So, find a way to deal with the stress and take stock. It’s the only way you’ll be able to harness your fear and get the job done.

  1. Find Support

No one ever failed by having a strong support system. Surround yourself with people who encourage you to do better. These are the people who listen to you when you’re venting about your fears and anxiety, and they still choose to love you unconditionally.

A lot of research has been carried out on the benefits of having a support system. It empowers you with good coping skills while boosting your self-esteem and overall well-being.

Moreover, a sound support system can lower stress, anxiety, and depression rates. 

  1. Be Positive

Whenever you’re afraid, you’ll tend to focus on negative thoughts and emotions. But then, they fester in your mind and transform into this big, ugly thing that you can no longer control.

Why not try some positivity for a change? Remember, the mind is quite powerful; it just needs a small push in the right direction.

By thinking positively, you can overcome your fears and actually live to tell the tale! All you have to do is believe it, and everything else will fall into place.

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Forgiveness: Another Way to Eliminate Negativity

When people treat you wrong, it is very easy to hold a grudge. You may not understand how it could be possible to forgive someone for a slight, especially if the action was especially hurtful. Maybe you think forgiveness is about the other person and somehow,they benefit from you forgiving them. Forgiveness is not about the other person; it is about you. 

Forgiving another person does not always mean they stay in your life. Sometimes you do not even let them know you are forgiving them. You do not even need to trust them again. Just forgive them to eliminate the negativity in your life. 

 

Even horrific crimes can be forgiven. For safety reasons, you may want to use an indirect way of forgiving them instead of contacting them directly. Write a letter as if you plan on sending it to the other person. Talk about how what they did made you feel, and about how it made you think about yourself. Write about how you are no longer going to allow them space in your head and how you forgive them for what they did to you. 

 

When you finish writing, seal up the letter in an envelope and put their name on the front. Then either throw it away (shred it first!) or burn the letter. It does not have to actually be read by the person you are forgiving, this exercise is to help you get past the negativity and the chains that are holding you back as a person. 

 

If you find you can’t forgive on your own, you may want to talk with a professional. Therapy can really help you get past this hurdle. Especially if the person committed a serious crime. If you have been abused, particularly over a long period of time, you may need therapy to help you get past what was done to you. There is nothing wrong with seeking help. 

 

Once you have forgiven the other person, you will feel like a weight has been lifted, or chains have been removed. Grudges are not healthy for you and they do not affect the other person. When you bottle up negative feelings, you can increase your risks of developing heart disease, and other health conditions. You tend to age faster as well. Not forgiving others can dim your overall outlook on life, so why put yourself through all of that? 

 

Remember that forgiveness is not about the other person, it is about eliminating the negativity in your own life. So free yourself today by forgiving others for the wrongs they have done to you.